Chop, chop

I never quite got Alaska. 

 I lived here for four years, and all that time I never quite felt at home here.

 And then, in the fifth year, something changed.

 Without realizing it, I find myself at home here.
I have learned many things in five years. I'm still a terrible skier, but I love the winter trails. I love the stillness and the low-angled sun of winter.

 I learned to bake really good bread here. And can berries that I pick myself. I can pick wild mushrooms in my backyard and eat them for dinner and know that I will be fine.

 I can walk through the Arctic tundra in summer without fear. I know how to use bear mace, a compass, a satellite phone.  I am learning day by day what it is to be an outdoorswoman and a scientist. I may never be a dogmusher or a kayaker, but I don't really know that yet--I mean, it could happen!

 All these things were not anywhere near my hopes and dreams a few short years ago. I didn't know I was on a path to find them, but they are all so much a part of me now. I could easily see myself living out my days here. I never expected that.

How did I finally get it? I bought a brand new axe today. In Alaska, that is a form of love.